#87 Be Surrendered

I’ve been through some interesting challenges over the recent weeks. My work has been on a low since pre-Christmas with only a few little jobs here and there. I didn’t feel in demand or needed as much as I was before when things were really busy and I wished they were a bit quieter. And with those few jobs that did come through, I allowed myself to wander in thoughts wishing for greater, more significant and purposeful tasks. Stuff that makes a “real” impact. I ended up in a small crisis; feeling lost and unsure whether what I am doing is the right thing. And to be completely honest that’s not the first time this type of self-created crisis has cropped up – it has been a pattern for quite some time. But does that mean that what I am doing is not the right thing for me to do and I should change? A few years back with a little less years on the clock, that’s exactly what I would have done. Change something. And then when the initial enthusiasm of this change has worn off, change again. I was assuming that if I want to be more content and happy with my life, I have to simply change my life situation, as often as required to find what “truly” makes me happy. After several trials, I am not convinced anymore sure that this assumption holds true. Don’t get me wrong, all these changes have led me to live the life I have always dreamt of – with some of the best surfbreaks in the world directly at my doorstep...